2012 and my Current accomplishments, concerns and feelings this fresh year

2012' and my Start

Hello there Bloggers, I'm not sure who tunes into my Blog, but I do know that I have been on Hiatus. And for that I apologize.  I have been focused and determined to complete what goals I could last year/last month and I did.  I prepared for the GED and thru all the struggles, tears, worries:

I Passed that Test with flying colors!  Finally, that door of opportunity was now opened for me. It was closed for so long but not anymore. I've been out of regular school for at least 6 years. During that time, I was working, raising my nieces, taking care of my Family and trying to survive.  I've also applied for college, Computer Science because I love technology and to "fix" or trouble shoot and enhance programs and hardware. I'm also looking to transfer later on, maybe a year or 2 into a field of work in psychology, mainly, Sociology.

I'm back with my Mother, and our relationship took a positive turn. We reconciled our misunderstanding as a distant thing. Not big enough to tear our bond.  I'm so grateful to the Lord for hope to be revealed to me about our Mother-daughter relationship. Things are a lot better then before, she has opened up to me and we are on the right track. 

I also found...unexpected tender, strong Love. It's a healthy relationship. He's very supportive and very understanding. Very loving and I smile when I think about him, and his hearty laughter..his strong arms, his businessman demeanor, his tender, yet loving kisses. Hr also tickles me to death with his hilarious jokes and playful attitude! It has gotten pretty serious, and I hope I have some good news to tell you all by July 2012:) some official news!   Keep me in your prayers.  Hah.   I am giving him a hard/beautiful time.   I say hard because being on my own and dealing with some horrific incidents in the past 3 years...the past month....have taken a toll on my emotions, my heart and my strength.


 But one thing I have never lost, is my faith in the Most High. God has kept me alive all this time, helped me get thru it all. I am forever grateful and continuing on the path that he has set for me. For my life was already written, I am just trying to help every person that I can, and I am not the most public person. Very private, but if my Blogs help. Then I'm grateful...

Apparently, some of my childhood trauma are creeping up on me. It all wasn't addressed, I did have years of therapy and formed my own way of coping, my own way of protecting my body, mind and soul. But what bothers me, is that I have a hard time fully trusting men. It's putting a damper on my relationship right now and didn't know it was an underlying issue I've been healing and come a long way, yet I worry about things..that many young women don't have to worry about too much. I wouldn't wish it upon my worst enemy to go thru the Trauma that I have gone thru.  

But I'm here. And the living breathing Christian woman, striving forward to fulfill my purpose that God has set before me and to complete my personal goals. This year, I want to be a Wife, a Mother, have foundation and a Career in Technology and Psychology, to be specific, Sociology.  To also, better myself, from the inside out. I have been reconstructing what my past has smashed into pieces. Bit by bit and I am liking what I see. May take a lifetime but I know that I am on the right path.

There is a God, God is love, he is the breathe in your body, the conscience of your mind, the pain in your heart when something bothers you.  Have faith, remain steadfast, help out all those you can, follow in Jesus Christ's footsteps and seek counsel thru God's word, thru the Bible.  Thank you all and God Bless each and everyone of you.